So… You’re Married to a Nurse? Buckle Up!
My spouse has been a nurse for over 27 years—and let me tell you, it’s a wild ride. There are days when being married to a nurse feels like winning the lottery, and others when you’d rather take your chances in traffic. Did I mention nurses can be a little intense sometimes? (Just kidding, honey… mostly.)
If you’re thinking about marrying a nurse, you might want to pause and really think it through. Kidding again! In truth, nurses make incredible partners—compassionate, capable, and loyal to a fault. It’s not always a smooth journey, but I wouldn’t trade these decades together for the world. Unless, of course, we’re talking about a billion dollars… Then we’d at least discuss it.
Here’s how you know you’ve tied the knot with a nurse:
You Know You’re Married to a Nurse When…
- Your dinner conversations sound like scenes from a medical horror movie—and you’re expected to keep chewing.
- You get a lecture about your cholesterol levels before you’ve finished your burger.
- You eat alone more often than not, and vacations are never truly safe from a last-minute “Can you come in tonight?” call.
- They cook gourmet meals for the unit potluck, but at home, you’re lucky if there’s cereal.
- Saying “Hope you’re having a quiet shift!” is grounds for divorce. Superstition is serious business.
- Watching a medical drama becomes a two-hour breakdown of everything Hollywood got wrong.
- You’ve become the official laundry commander—and don’t even ask what was on those scrubs.
- Teachers assume you’re a single parent because your spouse works nights and weekends.
- You say “bless you” to sneezes, they analyze it for flu symptoms and airborne pathogens.
- Playing sick won’t get you sympathy. They see through you faster than an X-ray.
- Your home is a free clinic for neighbors, friends, and that one cousin who always needs “a quick look at this rash.”
- You know more about your prescriptions than your pharmacist does—thanks to daily nursing school flashbacks.
- You’ve been guilt-tripped out of eating dessert more times than you can count.
- You learn the hard way: full moons = cranky post-shift nurse. Don’t ask. Just hide.
- You haven’t seen your doctor in years—because why would you when your spouse has a stethoscope and opinions?
- In a crisis, they switch into professional mode and suddenly become the calmest person in the room.
- You master the art of silent tip-toeing when they’re sleeping after night shift.
- No coffee = no conversation. Approach with caution or sacrifice your soul.
- You’ve seen things in the laundry you can’t unsee—and you still did the wash.
- You now refer to wine as “therapy in a bottle”—purely in support of your spouse, of course.
- You’ve accepted that Valentine’s Day, Christmas, and birthdays may all fall on “Sorry, I’ve got a shift” days.
- You flinch every time someone says “code brown” at home—even if it’s just about the dog.
- You’ve been used as a practice dummy for blood pressure cuffs and wound dressings.
- You’ve been scolded for not using enough hand sanitizer on the airplane tray table.
- They diagnose fictional characters faster than the plot unfolds.
- Their idea of “light reading” includes case studies and nursing journals.
- You never have to guess what mood they’re in—the sigh when they walk through the door says it all.
- They can sleep like a rock through thunderstorms but will wake up at the faintest IV pump beep.
- Their scrubs have more pockets than your hiking gear—and all are filled with mystery items.
- You admire them endlessly because deep down, you know they carry the weight of the world—and still come home to you.
Bottom Line?
Marrying a nurse is not for the faint of heart. But if you can handle the unpredictability, the long shifts, and the occasional anatomy lecture over dinner, you’ll discover that nurses are some of the strongest, kindest, most selfless people you’ll ever know. And they love fiercely—even if they do correct your handwashing technique.